If you’ve never experienced female ejaculation, either as the giver or receiver, it’s time to try. Sign up for my Cheat Sheet for making her squirt and have all the information you need right at your fingertips!
Updated September 24, 2021.
But before we start, I want to give you some information to clear up many of the misconceptions people have about squirting. First and foremost, it is not urine. Again it is NOT urine. Female ejaculate’s a clear fluid expelled from (or near) the urethra, very similar to men’s ejaculate, but without the sperm.
Although there’s not unanimous agreement, far from it actually, the consciences is that the G-Spot is basically the female equivalent to a man’s prostate. And that, like the prostate, when stimulated a specific way, the G-spot can cause the body to expel a fluid. This ejaculation occurs, we think, near the urethra in what is called the Skene’s gland.
While science isn’t yet sure if female ejaculation is available to all people with vaginas (the placement of the Skene’s gland may be interior for some women, making the even less noticeable), what we do know for sure is that the more a woman’s in touch with her body, together with how comfortable she is with herself sexually, the easier it will be for her to squirt.
Let’s talk about how you make female ejaculation happen. To keep everyone on the same page, I’m taking the approach of coaching a lover through making their partner squirt. Obviously, you don’t have to do it that way, but for clarity’s sake, that seems easiest.
And, while can make yourself squirt, it is, by far, easier to have someone do this to you, at least until you learn how it feels and how to control it.
So, without further ado…
Here’s your guide to female ejaculation
If you want to give your lady a squirting orgasm, there’s a few things to do and some items to have on hand before you start. First, make sure you’ve talked to her about it. You need her cooperation and, at times, assistance, so this isn’t something you can do without her being into it.
She’s got to be relaxed and not at all hesitant, because that only makes it more difficult.
Lastly, a few items to have on hand:
- A Vibratex Wand, which is totally not necessary, but definitely helps
- A quite and comfortable area
Before things get started have her pee. This eliminates her concern that she’s going to pee on you and can make the process of female ejaculation a little easier.
Start with Foreplay. And Lots of It.
If you want your lady to experience female ejaculation, she needs to relax enough to let go and she needs to know that you’re not going to freak out when she squirts all over you.
To help her get there, begin with foreplay. It doesn’t matter what kind of foreplay, as long as it involves hands, mouths, and bodies. You want to turn her on, but take your time doing it. Move slow, enjoy the journey, and make sure she’s excited and wet before you even try to find her G-Spot.
Stimulate Her G-Spot.
Once she’s aroused and excited, have her lay back on the bed with her legs spread and knees pointing toward the ceiling. Lube up, even if she’s wet. Right now, there’s no such things as too much lube.
Take two fingers, I prefer the middle and ring finger on my dominant hand, but whatever feels most natural to you, and insert them into her pussy, palm facing the ceiling. Bend your fingers up toward her stomach. Somewhere, about one to two inches inside her vagina (think of trying to touch the back of her clit), you should feel a spongy area.
This, my friends, is the G-Spot.
Using a “come here” type motion with your fingers (pulling up and in) massage this spot. Don’t stop. In many women, it will swell and become hard and ridged. If this happen, it’s a good sign.
Increase your pressure. You may massage. You may tap. Feel around and do what seems to bring the best response from your lover. You can even place the heel of your other hand above her pubic bone (right above the hair-line) and press down slightly. This brings the G-spot closer to your hand and should increase her pleasure even more.
Don’t be afraid. Your touch doesn’t need to be too gentle here. I hate to say it shouldn’t be gentle, but really, it shouldn’t be. I’d almost like to say make it rough… Many women need a lot of stimulation to reach female ejaculation and the vagina isn’t designed for a gentle touch. It’s made for childbirth, and I promise, you can’t break it with just your fingers.
Time for Squirting
As her G-Spot hardens and her pleasure increases, she should begin to feel a pressure, sort of like she has to pee. Reassure her that this is normal and not to worry about it, she’s not going to pee. Encourage her to let go, and give in to the feeling.
If she continues to hold back, tell her how excited you are and how much you want her to cum. For those of you on the kinkier side of things, words like, “Good girl” can make a difference. If she hasn’t squirted by this point, have her bear down on her pelvic floor when she feels an orgasm approaching, which should move the process along.
Now would also be the opportune time to add in some clitoral stimulation, whether from a vibrator, clit sucker, or your mouth.
And just because she orgasms doesn’t mean that she’s not going to squirt. A lot of times, she may need multiple orgasms to build up to an ejaculating orgasm. So don’t stop your stimulation on her G-Spot just because she’s withering underneath your hands.
If you think she’s getting close to cumming, be prepared. These orgasms are often intense and may be unlike any that she’s experienced. She may need a little time to recover.
Don’t Give Up.
Don’t become discouraged if female ejaculation doesn’t happen the first time, as some women will have trouble. It’s new feelings and sensations. And as long as your both getting off and having a good time doing it, there’s only fun in trying.
Remember, all things take practice.
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tom ellis · at
Thank you will take all the help I can get
Molly · at
No problem. If you have any questions, now or in the future, don’t hesitate to ask!
Cynthia · at
I have been one of the luckiest women in the world to have a man discover this amazing practice!!! OMG I love squirting, and he loves making me cum this way. Our issue now is, after years of being the only man (or woman) on earth to make me squirt, I haven’t been able to for a very long time. We have had a lot of issues lately, so I am positive it is only the stressful life we must lead at this point in time. However, I would love to give us both this gift again. How do I do this? I so miss that part of lovemaking, as we are both soooo in love and soooo into each other, even after almost 20 years of being together.
Thank you for establishing this website!!!
Molly · at
It very well could be stress. Or perhaps that and a combination of hormonal changes, depending on your age. Perimenopause and menopause can wreck havoc on our lady parts! I’d say start with a date night, away from the stress. Spend time flirting and arousing one another. And when it’s time to hit the sheets, spend as much time with foreplay as possible. And see if that doesn’t help.
If you are peri-menopausal or menopausal, a different approach may be required, so let me know and I can elaborate on that.
Hope that helps!
Cyndy · at
I am at that age, as is he. He is 46, with various health issues, I am 44 with a partial hysterectomy, so your response makes a lot of sense. Please let me know what else we can do, as date nights are hot, but could be much better 🙂
Molly · at
I’m actually in the process of finishing up a co-authored book about sex after menopause, so I’ve actually got a lot to say on the subject. Give me a few days and I’ll write up a post with some recommendations.
Vince · at
Always learn something reading something from you. Saved for future use
Molly · at
Glad to be helpful! 🙂
Fariha · at
I will try this tonite
Molly · at
🙂 I hope you enjoy it!
richard · at
Molly · at
Thank you. If any questions arise, please just let me know!
dean · at
I just read a interesting bit on FE…..I think they tried the experiment on seven women whom all said that they ejaculated during sex! They had the women empty their bladder, confirmed with a ultrasound, and they were told to resume stimulation, still monitoring the bladder with the ultrasound, sure enough in some of the women it was filling again, when stimulation resumed, now they said that the para urethral glands produce the ejaculate, which is dumped into the urethra, they also said that squirting does occur before, during or after orgasm, which I would assume refers to muscle tension or vaginal contraction during orgasm, however with some women the ejaculate is expelled outwards, consequently exiting the urethra, or it is pushed the other way back to the bladder, and will be expelled at a further time! I find this interesting because my past partner would always go to the bathroom before any sex play, and she always had to go right away after sex, and it was not from being over hydrated! Anyway I found this interesting and thought I would share that
Branco · at
We’ve tried it a few times. My wife whenever she got to a point she felt intense, she started to say it hurt her. Only once she got to a part where she had to cry afterwards and said it felt so good and never felt like before. But we’re back at the part where she says it hurts, but not really more of a awkward feeling. So now im down to whether its me whos doing it wrong or her not being able or something..
Hope for some tips to get her over the part that ‘hurts’.. I dont get it.
Molly · at
Can you give me more insight on the “hurt?”
Is it possible that the lubrication is used up? It’s also possible that she’s dehydrated. When I have “squirting” orgasms, but don’t have enough fluid, it almost creates a burning sensation… Almost what I imagine dry cumming is like for a man. Also, science isn’t sure it’s possible for all woman to “squirt” (although I believe all should be able to have G-spot orgasms), so don’t get discouraged if it doesn’t happen.
Depending on your wife’s age, hormones may be a factor. I was just reading something the other day about woman’s orgasms and how much they can fluctuate throughout her cycle.
Branco · at
She would indeed say that it started to burn and feel too intense. She eventually gets quite dry too after about 20 mins of trying it. Shes almost 19.
Ian · at
You are the good describer
Channing · at
So glad I found this thank you so much I’m going to try this tonight when she gets home got dinner ready her cloths laid out for when she gets out of the shower.. super excited